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I wish I could explain this to the librarians. I smiled and led him there. He and I were enjoying a mutually desired sexual experience, and by making that distinction he was importing the language of coercion and assault into sex that was healthy. By Maureen Dowd Opinion Columnist. A version of this article appears in print onon Page SR9 of the New York edition with the headline: As with recreational drug use, tedium is often the catalyst. Contrary to anecdotal claims of the hegemony of hookup culture, several studies suggest young adults are not having as much sex as believed.

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But I do occasionally wonder:

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Let’s Not Get to Know Each Other Better

Few ever seem to say precisely what they mean or what they expect. I always want to ask how they do it. Newsletter Sign Up Continue reading the main story Please verify you're not a robot by clicking the box. Next, the couple sit on the bed or futon in the case of nicer dorms and decide what movie or show to watch. But just hanging out and swapping stories, laughing a little, creates a spark and the attraction builds, eventually leading to the big wet kiss that changes everything and nothing. I thought there must be something terribly, medically wrong with me if I could so badly misinterpret a situation. Sign up here to get it in your inbox.

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